If Amanda Urban Was In Philedelphia
by Samyo
Summary: Sequel to If Amanda Urban Was in Moulin Rouge.This is a Sixth Sense Fic, so don't flame me.


**Title:** If Amanda Urban was in Philadelphia

**Author:** Samyo

**Rating:** PG-13 (a very high PG-13 indeed)

**Genre:** Humor

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**Disclaimer:** You are reading this at your own will, it is not my fault that I'm am forced to write stupid stories during homeroom because I finish all of my homework at home (though I mostly wrote it for the mourning of our country being controlled for another four years by Bush, that stupid idiot). I own nothing, if I did, I would have my own computer. Amanda Urban has given me permission to use her name.

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As you know, Amanda's Urban's adventures always end in tragedy or happiness if you enjoy her gerbil mind being killed off (which many do). You think she's dead, but she always comes back; not this time.

Yes, this is true, and no, I did not run out of ideas. Amanda is now a ghost, but as she's famous for, she's too stupid to figure that out.

"Cool, I can float through doors."

Is she now a ghost because the haul of the Titanic fell on her head, because Captain Nemo blew up the building she was in, or was it because she was air-launched by a windmill, hit the Eiffel Tower, and fell to her death?

No, no, no, you stupid gerbils! It was because she was hit by a car while riding a bike that she stole from a sweet little girl eating an ice cream cone.

Do not panic, I know this is confusing, for it is a way too lame way for her to die, but here's the story:

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Amanda Urban was walking down the street one day, being a more than usual American Idiot. She was depressed; some chode had stolen her HBO. In result of her retarded, twisted mind, she began to sing a song about it.

_"Some chode has stole my HBO,_

_Now I can't watch the Sopranos._

_Who will die or see the shrink this week?_

_Some chode has stolen my HBO."_

"Damn it!"

_"Thank God Sex and the City has reruns,_

_Or I'd have to kill someone._

_Cable is so great for that,_

_Except when they edit out all the sex."_

"Double damn it!"

_"There is a T.V. and satellite,_

_Hundreds of channels of every kind._

_I turn it on and watch HBO,_

_Where the hell is my HBO?"_

"Damn whoever did this!"

_"No one can talk while I watch,_

_Not when my HBO is turned on."_

"Those damn, dirty apes; it was them!"

_"Oh no, I'm trying to sing and speak at the same time._

_That big, fat chode stole it..."_

"Hey, wait a second," Amanda yelled has the horrid droning stopped. "I stole it, and I'm not an ape or a chode' I'm a gerbil!"

You thought that she had discovered the meaning of life, she was so enlightened.

During her horrible, twisted, completely different take on Les Miserables "Castle on a Cloud," she had stolen a pink bicycle from a little girl eating an ice cream cone.

"Hey, but some chode had stole my HBO."

Being the stupid idiot that she was, she drove on the wrong side of the road and got hit by a car. Sadly, unlike previous adventures of stupidity, she died.

"Pretty light at the end of the tunnel, must go to..."

Sadly, she saw no light at the end of the tunnel; it was just an effect for Abstine rehab. Still, she was dead, and as stated earlier, she didn't know.

"Damn it, I got blood all over my clothes. Thank God there's a laundry detergent sale at Wal-Mart."

She got up and walked away, too stupid to notice the twenty cars that she magically floated through. Nobody notice her, except for a priest that caught her on fire with holy water while trying to exorcise her.

"Pretty fire."

She stopped, finally, next to a car that held a cute little boy talking to his mother.

"She broke her neck."

"Oh, God, can you see it? Where, I can't see it?"

"She's by my window."

"I sure am!"

* * *

That night:

Amanda was in an apartment that was really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really cold.

"Dude, somebody needs to call the Culligan man."

To step aside for a brief moment, Culligan is a company that bottles water. I will not go on on this, for it is just too stupid (for water softener guys don't fix heating).

Suddenly, she was standing in front of the boy; the same little boy who was in the car.

"I see dead people," the little boy said in an eerie voice.

"Hey, me too!"

To really step aside for a moment, remember that ghost in the movie that pukes a lot? Anymore, I don't have to say it, but I'll say it anyway in fear of pheasants coming after me with pitchforks. Yep, that was Amanda.

She started throwing up, it was the color orange. Then, it turned green, and pretty soon, it went through all of the colors on the Sherman Williams color wheel. It was quite amazing; she had been throwing up for several hours.

"It must have been something I ate a couple months ago. Damn Taco Bell!"

The pool of vomit was now up to her knees, she was now puking up vital organs. Then, as lemmings jump off a cliff, she dropped dead, though she was already dead, but I wrote this so I make the rules.

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Moral: Never blame a chode for stealing your HBO or else you will vomit till you die.

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Please reveiw. 


End file.
